A Decade of Parenting

The kid turned 10! I don’t even know where to start. It feels like a lifetime ago but somehow it went by in the blink of an eye. 10 years ago we were 27 years old. 10 years into our relationship and 3 years into our marriage. Like any pregnancy that comes after a miscarriage it was a mixed bag of emotions. We’d made it through the epilogue this time and chapter 1 was finally beginning. In true O style, he crashed instead of sailed into our world. Just a skinny, leggy hot mess of a rainbow baby!

A lot went down in the first years of his little life. We moved him from sunny window to sunny window to sort out his jaundice, we figured out his lactose intolerance, we did physio for his neck. We moved. We made plans. We had E. We set goals. We moved again. B got his big boy job. We had G. We moved AGAIN and then another time and then Baby J and then another move…

It’s been a whole ass decade! It sometimes feels like I’ve gotten nothing done but somehow managed to get SO much done! We’ve changed so much in these 10 years. Who we are as adults, as partners, as parents.

I’m trying not to think about the fact that in another 10 years he won’t live in the same house as us anymore. He’ll be a young man out in the world. I’m definitely not ready for that! What if he goes through a “don’t call me Ollie, call me Oliver” phase. Y’all….he’ll say it in a deep voice that I’m also not ready for. Right now he’s in-between. Still a little kid in so many ways, but more and more I catch those little glimpses of maturity. Those little turns of phrase peppering his conversations. Using slang in context. Reading novels with no illustrations in sight. Texting his cousins more than a series of emoticons. The attitude… The little things that add up to a whole tween.

I’m trying, as always, to enjoy each phase. To take it as it is and remind myself that the repetition, the conversations, the hard days are building his foundation. Everyday we pour our patience and love into those bricks. This is a time for teaching him how to use his tools. One day soon, if we get this (at least half) right he’ll start using these tools to build his house and we’ll know that the foundation is strong and that he knows how to wield them.

10 is a big deal. Big for him, but also big for us. We didn’t fuck it up. Not yet anyway. So far so good! We’re still going strong on the parenting front, which is good because we have to survive all 4 of them being teenagers at the same time…

So here’s to 10 more years. And another 10 after that. And then 10 more after that because if you think I’m the kind of Mama that won’t set a grown ass man straight you’re dead wrong! (You want to act like a child I’ll treat you like a damn child!)

I love you hotter than the sun my baby, my rainbow, my OllieMonster, my Ollie, and one day my deep-voiced Oliver. I’m looking forward to our adventures yet to come.

And a shout-out to B, for parenting his childish ass off with me!